sounds so cordial.
Yet when the told their unwelcome plan back in September 2021, informing the five-time All-Star that he would barely play in the coming season because of their youth movement, there was nothing cordial about his response.
“Pissed as hell,” Wall told The Athletic recently. “Pissed as hell. I wanted to play basketball.”
Can you really blame him?
After everything Wall had been through, from the Achilles tendon tear in February 2019 to the death of his beloved mother, Frances Pulley, from cancer eight months later to the choice to trade him to Houston in December 2020 that sent him down the darkest of roads in the months that followed, Wall had already endured plenty of painful moments. To hear that his career was in serious jeopardy, with Rockets officials explaining that he would only play sporadically and would be better off heading home while they pursued a trade, was enough to make him wonder if he’d ever find a way back on the court again.
But now he’s back, as he declared in the summertime run with new teammate in which he . Or, as he put it in the last month, he’s “still here.”
When I saw the 32-year-old Wall sitting courtside at the Golden 1 Center in Sacramento on Saturday during Clippers shoot-around, there was a sense of relief that he was, well, still here. He had chosen to be brutally honest about his mental health struggles, detailing those nights when he considered taking his own life and explaining why money truly doesn’t buy happiness. And then, as we saw in that Thursday win against and the (15 points, four rebounds, three assists in 25 minutes) and Sunday’s loss against (17 points, four assists in 21 minutes), he reminded the NBA at large that he wasn’t done just yet (he didn’t play in the win against the ).
For the Clippers’ purposes, Wall provides the kind of point guard punch they so desperately needed. Veteran did an admirable job last season, when missed the entire campaign while recovering from his torn ACL and Paul George (elbow) played just 31 games.
But now, with Wall adding his one-of-a-kind dimension off the bench and their dynamic duo back in the fold again, these Clippers are widely seen as title contenders yet again. As for Wall, who agreed to a buyout with the Rockets in June and signed with the Clippers soon thereafter, this is his chance to finish his career on his terms. The hope, of course, is that he finds peace, prosperity and health — of all kinds — along the way.
The following conversation has been lightly edited for brevity and clarity.
From a human standpoint, I was moved by what you wrote on The Players’ Tribune. And basketball-wise, to see you out there against the Lakers, I’m thinking, ‘Damn, he’s still got the jets. He’s still got the midi.’ And then I saw the smile on your face as you walked off the court. Just how fired up are you to be back and feeling good again?
Super, man. I look at it like this: Life is made out for us, and we’re just living in it. I mean, God already got it mapped out for us, and I think God gives his toughest battles to his strongest people. I think during the time when I had my Achilles injury, it was perfect timing for me to have that injury, because my mom had been diagnosed with breast cancer and my first son was born. So I got to spend time working through that whole process, taking her to chemo and stuff like that. I got to see my first son being raised every day. Most of the time when you have a kid, we’re midseason (with the team). We don’t get to see them grow every day. We miss the steps because we’ve got to travel. So I think all that (was a blessing). And then just all the hard work I’ve been through.
Sometimes the people that you have close to you, you have to learn to love them from a distance, because sometimes they might be the person that’s holding you down when you’re trying to prosper and grow. They don’t want you to get to that level. But having a great team around you, having my two boys, my stepdaughter, the mother of my kids, my family, all the people who were in my circle through this whole tough time who could have given up on me. Even my trainer, Jared Wilson, my (physical therapist), my trainer, Ronnie Taylor, all those guys that when I was like, ‘Man, I’m trying to work. I’m trying to keep going. I know I’ve got a lot left in the tank. I’m nowhere near done.’ They could have been like, ‘Man, F that. We don’t want to do this for you. You’re not in the league right now. Like, why are we helping you?’ You know what I mean?
Oh, yeah. It’s a what-have-you-done-for-me-lately league.
Yeah, and those are the people who were on my phone constantly. Like now, after the game the other day (against the Lakers), yeah, I expect a lot of people to want to call me and contact me. But I look at like this: I appreciate it, but really I’m still gonna message you from a distance because when I needed people … (and) when I needed the love and the support, it wasn’t really (there) but from a certain amount of people.
You know who stepped up for you.
Yeah. And I knew I had so much left in the tank. That’s why it’s great to be with a great organization, a great group of guys, a great coaching staff, because a lot of teams said, ‘Well, we didn’t see you play and we don’t know if you’ve still got it.’ And I’m like, ‘Just give me a chance. I know what I’ve got. Just give me a chance.’ And they gave me a chance. Playing with a great team, you’re still trying to figure things out, build things out, and we’ve got a couple of guys on minute restrictions. But I feel like when we get all that down and pat, we’re gonna be something special. It’s just about us trusting each other, us building on it. But yeah, all the shit I’ve been through the last couple of years has been amazing. I think it made me stronger.
Are you proud of yourself?
Yeah, super proud of myself. And I feel like the real ones never lose. That’s a quote I live by. I think if you stay true to yourself, and — like you said — just being authentic, that’s just how I was raised. My mom says, ‘Always be authentic, but just be known more as a better person (than a) basketball player.’ That takes you a long way in life, and that’s how I always try to examine myself.
No two situations are the same, right? So you have your journey, your struggle and your situation. But I also think around the league, this year more than most, we have a lot of guys who have a lot of years under their belt, who might have had to face their own basketball mortality but are back doing what they love. I just saw Dame (Lillard) the other day, and he talks similarly about how his injury allowed him to be closer with his kids. You have Kawhi coming back. I was in San Francisco last night, and you have Klay (Thompson) doing his thing and Jamal (Murray) making his way back.
Zion (Williamson). There are so many guys.
And then you have other guys — big-name guys — who are out. So Dwight (Howard) is out, Melo (Anthony) is out.
Kemba Walker’s out.
Right.
It’s kind of tough, because I feel like a lot of those vet guys can still contribute to a lot of teams, you know what I mean? And I just feel like they’re trying to push the old heads out. That’s just how I look at it. So I’m just happy I got the opportunity to be back in this because I could have been one of those guys who’s still trying to find a team. Like I said, I just think it’s all part of God’s plan. Me and Dame are very close. We came to Adidas together, went to China and stuff (in their earlier years). We became real close. That’s a person I respect because he’s real. I think he’s authentic. He’s not gonna sugarcoat it. He’s gonna tell you how it is. And he’s loyal. I look at loyalty as love. Everybody can tell you they love you, but I’d rather you show me your loyalty than tell me you love me. So that’s one guy I’m really close with in the league and who I really respect and fuck with. So when I saw him in Seattle (during the preseason), it was dope to see him back and dap him up, because that was my first time seeing him in a long time.
Sure. But what does that tell you about the league? Does it just remind you how cold it is?
I always look at everything as cold, you know what I mean? But there’s politics to it. It’s kind of shady, but it’s a business though. You know how this shit goes, how business goes. You can be the boss’ best friend and he can feel like, ‘Today, I want you to be gone.’
Yep. And DeMarcus (Cousins) is another one.
Yep, and that’s really my brother. So it’s a gift and a curse, man, to be who we are. We get to play the game. We get to make money and take care of our families and stuff like that. But if you get to the point where you’ve burned some bridges and did a couple of things, and you still want to play, it’s kind of hard because they kind of hold it against you — which is not wrong. You’ve got to plan your shit for when you get older, (because) if you ain’t the franchise guy on the team that drafted you, they don’t have to babysit you or cater to you as much as they did when that team was with you.
Like Westbrook right now.
Yeah. And what he’s going through is tough. You can tell he don’t have the joy right now.
The money is obviously incredible in this league, but you have all these reminders that it’s not everything.
Yeah, and that’s what I said in my article. Money and fame don’t mean shit if you don’t have peace in your life. We’re still regular people, just like they are. We’ve just got an opportunity to make enough money and play the sport that we love on the highest level. But we still go through the same normal day problems. People think we don’t have those. And I’m like, ‘Why the fuck would that go away?’ I mean, having the money and fame gives you more problems because people want more from you. It’s kind of hard to trust who you’re supposed to trust, and the ones you think are there for you end up not really doing it for you. That’s what really hurts you the most.
What’s the backstory on how you got here (with the Clippers). You’re sitting in Houston, and I’m sure you’re frustrated at the choice they made. I don’t want to speak for you, but I’m pretty confident you were frustrated.
Pissed as hell. Pissed as hell. I wanted to play basketball. In my last meeting I had there, they were like, ‘Oh, you had a great year the year before. We can’t wait to have you back next year. Build on this, and try to keep helping young guys.’ So I’m thinking I’ll play the same role I played the year before.
Who were you talking to?
I’m talking to (Rockets coach Stephen) Silas, and I ended up talking to (Rockets general manager) Rafael (Stone) too. Those are great guys, and I ended up talking to both of them. It’s the exit meeting, so you’re talking to both of them back-to-back. And I’m thinking, ‘OK, I’m coming back here next year. And I want to be in a winning situation, but whatever position God put me in, I’m built for it. I can get through it. I just want to help as much as I can.’ And I felt like I deserved to play, like I deserved to start. (But) if you drafted a guy No. 1, or No. 2, and he’s a point guard, like I totally get it. I’m not mad about that.
The Rockets traded with for in January 2021, then drafted another young guard in six months later (second overall) to round out their backcourt of the future.
So that was kind of tough for me to be in that situation, because I want to play. And then the whole time, I was like, ‘Man, we’ve got to find a way to get out of here.’ I know it’s gonna be harder because I had two years left (on his contract worth a combined $91 million).
How did they relay the word that they had changed their stance with you?
In August, I went back to check on my condo and I was going back to Miami, where I’ll (stay) in the summer. So they were like, ‘Yo, the thing is, listen, we’ll bring you out for like 10 minutes a game, and sometimes you won’t play at all, or you can just not play at all the whole year and we’ll try to find a trade.’ And I was like, ‘I’m not trying to play 10 minutes a game or not play some games.’ I didn’t want to do that.
You’ve got to bounce, but real quick before you go: Why the Clippers? What was the connection?
Me and ‘P’ (Paul George) were talking about it the whole time. We were trying to figure it out. I had two years left, and we were trying to wait until I had one year left and try to keep fighting.
sounds so cordial.
Yet when the told their unwelcome plan back in September 2021, informing the five-time All-Star that he would barely play in the coming season because of their youth movement, there was nothing cordial about his response.
“Pissed as hell,” Wall told The Athletic recently. “Pissed as hell. I wanted to play basketball.”
Can you really blame him?
After everything Wall had been through, from the Achilles tendon tear in February 2019 to the death of his beloved mother, Frances Pulley, from cancer eight months later to the choice to trade him to Houston in December 2020 that sent him down the darkest of roads in the months that followed, Wall had already endured plenty of painful moments. To hear that his career was in serious jeopardy, with Rockets officials explaining that he would only play sporadically and would be better off heading home while they pursued a trade, was enough to make him wonder if he’d ever find a way back on the court again.
But now he’s back, as he declared in the summertime run with new teammate in which he . Or, as he put it in the last month, he’s “still here.”
When I saw the 32-year-old Wall sitting courtside at the Golden 1 Center in Sacramento on Saturday during Clippers shoot-around, there was a sense of relief that he was, well, still here. He had chosen to be brutally honest about his mental health struggles, detailing those nights when he considered taking his own life and explaining why money truly doesn’t buy happiness. And then, as we saw in that Thursday win against and the (15 points, four rebounds, three assists in 25 minutes) and Sunday’s loss against (17 points, four assists in 21 minutes), he reminded the NBA at large that he wasn’t done just yet (he didn’t play in the win against the ).
For the Clippers’ purposes, Wall provides the kind of point guard punch they so desperately needed. Veteran did an admirable job last season, when missed the entire campaign while recovering from his torn ACL and Paul George (elbow) played just 31 games.
But now, with Wall adding his one-of-a-kind dimension off the bench and their dynamic duo back in the fold again, these Clippers are widely seen as title contenders yet again. As for Wall, who agreed to a buyout with the Rockets in June and signed with the Clippers soon thereafter, this is his chance to finish his career on his terms. The hope, of course, is that he finds peace, prosperity and health — of all kinds — along the way.
The following conversation has been lightly edited for brevity and clarity.
From a human standpoint, I was moved by what you wrote on The Players’ Tribune. And basketball-wise, to see you out there against the Lakers, I’m thinking, ‘Damn, he’s still got the jets. He’s still got the midi.’ And then I saw the smile on your face as you walked off the court. Just how fired up are you to be back and feeling good again?
Super, man. I look at it like this: Life is made out for us, and we’re just living in it. I mean, God already got it mapped out for us, and I think God gives his toughest battles to his strongest people. I think during the time when I had my Achilles injury, it was perfect timing for me to have that injury, because my mom had been diagnosed with breast cancer and my first son was born. So I got to spend time working through that whole process, taking her to chemo and stuff like that. I got to see my first son being raised every day. Most of the time when you have a kid, we’re midseason (with the team). We don’t get to see them grow every day. We miss the steps because we’ve got to travel. So I think all that (was a blessing). And then just all the hard work I’ve been through.
Sometimes the people that you have close to you, you have to learn to love them from a distance, because sometimes they might be the person that’s holding you down when you’re trying to prosper and grow. They don’t want you to get to that level. But having a great team around you, having my two boys, my stepdaughter, the mother of my kids, my family, all the people who were in my circle through this whole tough time who could have given up on me. Even my trainer, Jared Wilson, my (physical therapist), my trainer, Ronnie Taylor, all those guys that when I was like, ‘Man, I’m trying to work. I’m trying to keep going. I know I’ve got a lot left in the tank. I’m nowhere near done.’ They could have been like, ‘Man, F that. We don’t want to do this for you. You’re not in the league right now. Like, why are we helping you?’ You know what I mean?
Oh, yeah. It’s a what-have-you-done-for-me-lately league.
Yeah, and those are the people who were on my phone constantly. Like now, after the game the other day (against the Lakers), yeah, I expect a lot of people to want to call me and contact me. But I look at like this: I appreciate it, but really I’m still gonna message you from a distance because when I needed people … (and) when I needed the love and the support, it wasn’t really (there) but from a certain amount of people.
You know who stepped up for you.
Yeah. And I knew I had so much left in the tank. That’s why it’s great to be with a great organization, a great group of guys, a great coaching staff, because a lot of teams said, ‘Well, we didn’t see you play and we don’t know if you’ve still got it.’ And I’m like, ‘Just give me a chance. I know what I’ve got. Just give me a chance.’ And they gave me a chance. Playing with a great team, you’re still trying to figure things out, build things out, and we’ve got a couple of guys on minute restrictions. But I feel like when we get all that down and pat, we’re gonna be something special. It’s just about us trusting each other, us building on it. But yeah, all the shit I’ve been through the last couple of years has been amazing. I think it made me stronger.
Are you proud of yourself?
Yeah, super proud of myself. And I feel like the real ones never lose. That’s a quote I live by. I think if you stay true to yourself, and — like you said — just being authentic, that’s just how I was raised. My mom says, ‘Always be authentic, but just be known more as a better person (than a) basketball player.’ That takes you a long way in life, and that’s how I always try to examine myself.
No two situations are the same, right? So you have your journey, your struggle and your situation. But I also think around the league, this year more than most, we have a lot of guys who have a lot of years under their belt, who might have had to face their own basketball mortality but are back doing what they love. I just saw Dame (Lillard) the other day, and he talks similarly about how his injury allowed him to be closer with his kids. You have Kawhi coming back. I was in San Francisco last night, and you have Klay (Thompson) doing his thing and Jamal (Murray) making his way back.
Zion (Williamson). There are so many guys.
And then you have other guys — big-name guys — who are out. So Dwight (Howard) is out, Melo (Anthony) is out.
Kemba Walker’s out.
Right.
It’s kind of tough, because I feel like a lot of those vet guys can still contribute to a lot of teams, you know what I mean? And I just feel like they’re trying to push the old heads out. That’s just how I look at it. So I’m just happy I got the opportunity to be back in this because I could have been one of those guys who’s still trying to find a team. Like I said, I just think it’s all part of God’s plan. Me and Dame are very close. We came to Adidas together, went to China and stuff (in their earlier years). We became real close. That’s a person I respect because he’s real. I think he’s authentic. He’s not gonna sugarcoat it. He’s gonna tell you how it is. And he’s loyal. I look at loyalty as love. Everybody can tell you they love you, but I’d rather you show me your loyalty than tell me you love me. So that’s one guy I’m really close with in the league and who I really respect and fuck with. So when I saw him in Seattle (during the preseason), it was dope to see him back and dap him up, because that was my first time seeing him in a long time.
Sure. But what does that tell you about the league? Does it just remind you how cold it is?
I always look at everything as cold, you know what I mean? But there’s politics to it. It’s kind of shady, but it’s a business though. You know how this shit goes, how business goes. You can be the boss’ best friend and he can feel like, ‘Today, I want you to be gone.’
Yep. And DeMarcus (Cousins) is another one.
Yep, and that’s really my brother. So it’s a gift and a curse, man, to be who we are. We get to play the game. We get to make money and take care of our families and stuff like that. But if you get to the point where you’ve burned some bridges and did a couple of things, and you still want to play, it’s kind of hard because they kind of hold it against you — which is not wrong. You’ve got to plan your shit for when you get older, (because) if you ain’t the franchise guy on the team that drafted you, they don’t have to babysit you or cater to you as much as they did when that team was with you.
Like Westbrook right now.
Yeah. And what he’s going through is tough. You can tell he don’t have the joy right now.
The money is obviously incredible in this league, but you have all these reminders that it’s not everything.
Yeah, and that’s what I said in my article. Money and fame don’t mean shit if you don’t have peace in your life. We’re still regular people, just like they are. We’ve just got an opportunity to make enough money and play the sport that we love on the highest level. But we still go through the same normal day problems. People think we don’t have those. And I’m like, ‘Why the fuck would that go away?’ I mean, having the money and fame gives you more problems because people want more from you. It’s kind of hard to trust who you’re supposed to trust, and the ones you think are there for you end up not really doing it for you. That’s what really hurts you the most.
What’s the backstory on how you got here (with the Clippers). You’re sitting in Houston, and I’m sure you’re frustrated at the choice they made. I don’t want to speak for you, but I’m pretty confident you were frustrated.
Pissed as hell. Pissed as hell. I wanted to play basketball. In my last meeting I had there, they were like, ‘Oh, you had a great year the year before. We can’t wait to have you back next year. Build on this, and try to keep helping young guys.’ So I’m thinking I’ll play the same role I played the year before.
Who were you talking to?
I’m talking to (Rockets coach Stephen) Silas, and I ended up talking to (Rockets general manager) Rafael (Stone) too. Those are great guys, and I ended up talking to both of them. It’s the exit meeting, so you’re talking to both of them back-to-back. And I’m thinking, ‘OK, I’m coming back here next year. And I want to be in a winning situation, but whatever position God put me in, I’m built for it. I can get through it. I just want to help as much as I can.’ And I felt like I deserved to play, like I deserved to start. (But) if you drafted a guy No. 1, or No. 2, and he’s a point guard, like I totally get it. I’m not mad about that.
The Rockets traded with for in January 2021, then drafted another young guard in six months later (second overall) to round out their backcourt of the future.
So that was kind of tough for me to be in that situation, because I want to play. And then the whole time, I was like, ‘Man, we’ve got to find a way to get out of here.’ I know it’s gonna be harder because I had two years left (on his contract worth a combined $91 million).
How did they relay the word that they had changed their stance with you?
In August, I went back to check on my condo and I was going back to Miami, where I’ll (stay) in the summer. So they were like, ‘Yo, the thing is, listen, we’ll bring you out for like 10 minutes a game, and sometimes you won’t play at all, or you can just not play at all the whole year and we’ll try to find a trade.’ And I was like, ‘I’m not trying to play 10 minutes a game or not play some games.’ I didn’t want to do that.
You’ve got to bounce, but real quick before you go: Why the Clippers? What was the connection?
Me and ‘P’ (Paul George) were talking about it the whole time. We were trying to figure it out. I had two years left, and we were trying to wait until I had one year left and try to keep fighting.
